you're sitting somber side
and I'm just inside
the lights are off, my patience is off
and there is a brittle little box
of scar tissues
breathing to life.
poured empty out
rinsed heavy out
these cheap plastic cards
just like you'll never know the extents I went to
for you.
all effort lost or packed away.
you never saw. never came.
unless coming was too little too late
and I'm slightly if not very mesmorized
by the castle building skills you take
and master, these last few days
when you just stayed away
but I get it you know. for gettings sake.
and luckily?
the only thing that I'm better at than falling for
is falling for fake.

where do we file these
these important impossible things. under what category do we find ourselves.
defined by ourselves.
embroidered hearts on sweater arms, show the world or just one set of eyes
and compromise to fit the definition, or so it seems to be.
a challenge taken I suppose I’m taken a back, or a front.
to hazy eyelids closing around dark rooms uninhabitable, but she laughs
I can’t remember if it’s night or day. if the feeling in my stomach will ever go away
undecided I guess, we just become. irrational. rationalize. everything beating off rhythm
a heartbeat, a smile, finger nails trimmed. bored.
take the glass from me. take the glass from me. do something, do something.
ticking. restring. tune, lose. just a game. a toss up. I fear, I think, I fear and frighten. it’s motionless
this daydream. motionless.
until the candle flickers out and my smokes have all run out and she’s still sitting somewhere else.
of someone else s accord
disregard. the rhythm. it’s off.